


Saving You, Saving Me

by katelynalyse



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Falling In Love, Hurt Steve Rogers, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Protective Steve Rogers, Slow Burn, Steve Rogers Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-21
Updated: 2016-06-22
Packaged: 2018-07-16 12:03:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7267405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katelynalyse/pseuds/katelynalyse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stasia Sinclair has just accepted a new job at SI as an assistant for Dr. Banner.  With her bestie, Darcy Lewis, at her side and a new city to explore, she doesn't think life can get any better.  She sure never expects to meet the one person she's harbored a crush on since middle school history class.  Is it possible that Steve Rogers isn't all Captain America all the time like he wants everyone to think.  Maybe he's not a mindless war machine like everyone thinks.  Maybe he's just a normal guy with pain, heartache, and more losses than are imaginable.  And maybe Stasia can help him with that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, guys! This is my first time posting on A03 but I've read pretty much every Steve/Darcy, Steve/OC, Bucky/Darcy, and Bucky/OC that's out there. What can I say, I love those guys. Is it so hard to just let them have a happily ever after, Marvel?! I won't make any promises but I'm going to try updating at least once a week so hopefully I stick with that. Also, I edit my own work for now (until I can find a beta) so excuse any mistakes. 
> 
> Let's go on a journey together!

Stasia didn’t really know how her stupid crush on Steve Rogers had come about. If she were being honest with herself, she would have to say that it had always been around. As a child and teenager, she had been fascinated with the story of the slight boy from Brooklyn who had sacrificed his body and life over to science in order to help the Allied powers win the Second World War. When the Howling Commandos were mentioned or studied in class, all of the other girls had swooned over Bucky Barnes, with his good looks and rumored charming personality. Stasia could definitely see the appeal there, but she had always had a soft spot for the quiet, brave man with a plan. Her friends had teased her for years, saying that she would never get a boyfriend if she couldn’t get over a national icon who had died protecting his country almost 70 years prior. They were right, she never did get a boyfriend. 

Stasia was, however, well on her way to forgetting about her infatuation with Captain America when the world found out that he had been pulled out of the ice. Alive. Everyone had been shocked and a new generation became obsessed with the man out of time. The next few years flew by in a flurry. New York had been attacked and saved. London had been attacked and saved. Washington D.C. had been attacked and saved. It sure seemed that the good Captain still had it in him, and his fellow Avengers weren’t so bad either. In that time, Stasia had graduated college, gotten a job as a personal assistant, moved states twice, and bought a kitten named Elizabeth. Enough time had gone by that news about the Avengers team was almost a weekly occurrence and didn’t surprise anyone. However, Stasia would be lying if she said she didn’t keep up with the news reports intently every time she heard that they had been called out to another emergency. She was only worried about national security like any good American citizen would be. 

It wasn’t until the beginning of 2015 that Stasia’s world turned upside down. Her best friend from college, Darcy Lewis, was the assistant to Dr. Jane Foster, an astrophysicist who just so happened to be dating the almighty Thor. She and Darcy tried to call or Skype each other once every week or two to chat and catch up. It was always in the evenings when both girls were off work and could drink as much wine as they wanted without having to worry about responsibilities. So, it worried Stasia when she saw Darcy’s name flash up on her phone at eleven in the morning on a Tuesday. 

“Darcy, is everything ok,” she asked as soon as she answered the call.

“Dude! Everything is great, I have some news. Ask me what it is! Ask me what it is!!” 

“Ok….what’s your news?”

“Alright, first let me preface this by saying that you are not allowed to talk until I am done with my entire story and then the big question at the end. So, Jane and I got a little sick of Tromsø and all of its ‘cold as balls-ness.’ We were planning on going back to New Mexico and trying to set up a new lab there. But as soon as we packed our bags, a call came in from Tony Stark. The Tony Stark. As in, the epitome of sexy, cool, and dirty. He told Jane that since Thor would be staying at the Tower from now on, he might appreciate if his ‘Lady Love’ (his words, not mine) was nearby so he wouldn’t have to fly from so far away if an Assemble call was made. He also added that Jane was a genius and, as a fellow genius, he couldn’t let her be recruited by any other company. Stasia, he offered her a fully equipped lab on one of his R&D floors, access to all of his data, a salary for both of us, and private living quarters for me since she would obvs be staying with the mighty god of thunder. We moved in last week and it has been rad, dude. Seriously, I don’t think I could've imagined this setup in a thousand years. But, I’m rambling. Ok, so I walk into the lab this morning and Tony is waiting for me. He starts telling me that Bruce Banner, you know the Hulk, needs an assistant. Nothing Science!-y, just someone to type his notes up for him, get him coffee, keep him fed and watered, shit like that. So exactly what I do for Jane. Only, and he was very clear about this, the person has to be “nice, quiet, and extremely calm.” I guess because he could turn bananas in no time if things get crazy or frustrating. He wanted me to be in charge of finding someone and, of course I thought of you. He pulled your file and thought you would be perfect. Soooooo, Anastasia Marie Sinclair, would you do me the honor of dropping everything that you call a life in Bumfuck, Virginia and move to Avengers Tower to be the babysitter of a big giant green rage machine? Please, please, please! We can have sleepovers again and go explore New York City together!”

It hadn’t taken much more convincing to get Stasia to agree to the offer. Her life in Virginia was nothing that couldn’t be uprooted and she needed some adventure. Darcy had mentioned that an added benefit would be seeing all of the hot Avengers dripping with sweat after their daily workouts, but Stasia knew the only one she would ever see was her new boss, Dr. Banner. She doubted the others spent much time in the labs, and she was grateful for that. She would make a bumbling idiot out of herself if she ever met the others, she was sure. Especially a certain one.

________

 

Dr. Banner had turned out to be one of the nicest people she had ever met. He was a quiet, unassuming man who took afternoon meditation breaks and wore clothing that made him look like a suburban dad. She had taken a liking to him immediately. The only difficulties she ran into were making sure he ate and slept properly. It wasn’t hard to see why finding him an assistant was so important; the man would lose himself in his work so thoroughly, that he would die of starvation and/or sleep deprivation if left unattended. Stasia made sure that his meals were at the same time every single day, so that he could get into a healthy routine, and that he was out of his lab no later than nine every night. 

It was late one night, two months after she had taken the job, that JARVIS informed her of Dr. Banner’s return to the tower. The Avengers had been called out on a mission in Russia three days before and, according to the news coverage, it had been a rough one. She knew the Hulk had made an appearance and knew that Bruce probably wouldn’t be back in the labs for a few days. Deciding that it would be a good idea to cook a few things to leave in his fridge, Stasia left her apartment and took the elevator down to the communal floor where the huge industrial-sized kitchen was. 

“JARVIS, has Dr. Banner returned to human form yet,” she asked softly.

“No, Miss Sinclair. Dr. Banner is still in Hulk form and is up in the holding facilities on the 56th floor. Sir and Miss Romanov are keeping an eye on him.” The AI system always answered in a monotone voice, but Stasia thought sometimes that she could pick up on a caring way about him when it came to the people of the Tower.

“Thank you, JARVIS. I’m going to go cook a few dishes and put them in his apartment so he eats the next few days until he’s ready to see people again. I still have access to his quarters, correct?”  
“Of course, Miss Sinclair. I’m sure Dr. Banner will be very appreciative of your thoughtfulness. Here you are, 34th floor.”

Stasia stepped off the elevator and made her way to the kitchen. She started pulling out various bowls, ingredients, and utensils before pre-heating the oven and pulling a cookbook out of a drawer. She looked down at her dress from the day and laughed out loud. It was a gorgeous A-line with cap sleeves that was robin’s egg blue with vibrant flowers all over it. Standing in the kitchen in something like this, she looked like a regular Betty Crocker.

“JARVIS, can you play some swing music? I might as well have some mood music to go along with everything else,” she said smiling up at the ceiling where she knew the AI’s voice would come from.

“Of course, Miss.”

As Glen Miller came pouring out of the sound system, Stasia got to work cooking.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be two separate chapters but I couldn't decide on a natural break. *sigh

As much as Steve loved being big and strong enough nowadays to fight against the enemies and help protect everyone back home, sometimes he cursed the serum that ran through his veins. All he wanted to do after this last mission was crawl in bed and sleep for days. However, his stomach had other plans. He had to eat three times what a normal man did to keep up with his body’s fast metabolism on a regular day. Seeing as how he hadn’t had a proper meal in three days, his intestines were close to eating themselves, he was sure of it. He showered quickly and threw on a pair of well-worn jeans and a white short-sleeved t-shirt before going to the kitchenette in his apartment. Steve usually kept the cabinets pretty stocked, but he knew the stuff he had wasn’t going to cut it tonight. He needed a gigantic meal. He looked longingly at his bedroom door and his stomach rumbled not two seconds later. Sighing defeatedly, he shuffled towards the elevator and down to the communal kitchen which would most definitely be empty at this time of night.

Steve heard the song as soon as his feet hit the carpet outside the elevator. “In The Mood” drifted out of the kitchen doorway, and he walked as if in a daze to seek the familiar tune out. He was sure the minute he entered the large room that he had actually fallen asleep back at his place and was now dreaming, because right in front of him was the most gorgeous dame he had ever seen, dressed like she was ready to go out dancing, In fact, she was dancing. She hadn’t spotted him yet, but Steve watched as she gracefully flitted from the counter to mix something in a bowl to the oven to put in a pan and back to the counter. The girl was short, maybe just over five feet, with short, black curly hair that was a few inches above her shoulders and a heart-shaped face that looked almost angelic. Her dress caught his attention as she twirled and side-stepped. It was a beautiful blue that complimented her pale complexion and dark hair and he caught his breath at the picture that she made there in the kitchen. This stunning girl looked like everything he had ever wanted back in the 40s. 

He must have stayed in the doorway staring slack-jawed for a little too long because the next thing he knew, she made eye contact with him and many things happened at once in the following few seconds. She had been in the middle of another twirl and, when she had caught sight of him, gasped and tried to stop herself as quickly as possible. Her momentum had been so strong, however, that she lost her balance and, arms flailing, fell to the floor. An empty bowl had been knocked off of the counter in the process and it hit the floor and shattered as soon as Steve fell to his knees at her side to check her injuries. 

“Are you alright, ma’am,” he asked frantically. He started doing a mental check of any external damage that had been done to her, seeing none in the moment but knowing better than to believe that.

“Uh…um…y-yeah, I t-think so,” she answered timidly. She started to sit up but immediately hissed in pain and lifted her hand to cradle the back of her head. “Actually, I think I may have hit this pretty hard.” She closed her eyes and when she opened them again, Steve could see them swimming with unshed tears.

“Ok, I’m going to get you off this floor so you don’t get cut by any glass and I’ll take a look at your head. Is that ok with you?”

She nodded her head slightly and he scooped her up bridal-style to carry her into the living room area. After sitting her on the couch, he began inspecting her head carefully. She winced when he rubbed his fingers over the large, sensitive bump and he immediately pulled away.

“I’m sorry. The good news is that its just a bump, no blood or anything. I don’t think you need to go to Medical but you should probably try to stay up tonight just in case you have a concussion.”

“A concussion?! Could it really be that bad?”

“You never know, but its better to be safe than sorry. I’ll stay down here with you and keep you company so you don’t fall asleep, if you’d like.” Steve could feel the exhaustion in the back of his mind, but pushed it away for the time being. 

“Oh, you don’t have to do that, Mr. Rogers,” she said looking anywhere but at him. “I’m sure I can manage.”

“Steve, please. And I insist. Concussions aren’t things you want to mess with, ma’am.” He couldn’t help but be pleased at the fact that she had addressed him by his name and not his superhero title like almost everyone else seemed to. He caught her gaze and gave her his best stern look to let her know that he wasn’t going to back down on this.

She took a deep breath and sighed, her cheeks reddening. “Ok, Steve, thank you. Umm…I’m Stasia.”

“Stasia. I’ve never heard that one before. It’s very nice to meet you, ma’am.” He put his hand out and shook hers, a little surprised at the firm grip she had.  
“It’s actually short for Anastasia. You now, like the Russian czar’s daughter that went missing after her family was murdered?”

“I do, surprisingly. That’s some history I actually knew from before. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you around here, Stasia. Do you live in the tower?”

“Yeah, um, I was hired a few months ago to be Dr. Banner’s assistant. I’m always in his lab so that’s probably why we’ve never crossed paths before. I live on the 78th residential floor. Speaking of Dr. Banner, how is he after the mission? I asked JARVIS and he said he was still in Hulk form.”

“He’s fine, ma’am. Usually it takes Bruce a few hours to come down after we get home, there’s no need to worry.” As soon as he finished his sentence, his stomach gave the loudest growl he had ever heard and he looked down, embarrassed, as he felt heat flood his cheeks.

“Oh! I’m so rude,” the young woman jumped up from the couch. She wobbled slightly and Steve reached out to steady her before standing, himself. “I’ve made so much food, come in here and eat. You must be seriously starving!” 

Stasia hurried into the kitchen, the silent order to follow pushing him after her. He walked in and was hit with the most amazing smells. He must not have noticed them earlier when he was watching her, probably a little too distracted. 

“Sit, sit! I’ll get you a plate, what would you like to drink,” she inquired as she motioned him towards one of the barstools stationed behind some of the countertops. 

“Ma’am, I couldn’t eat your food. I was just coming down here to make a sandwich or something.” But his stomach betrayed him again and she looked at him unbelievingly. 

“First of all, its Stasia, remember? You don’t have to call me ma’am, even though it’s incredibly sweet of you. Second, this food wasn’t for me. I was making enough to feed Dr. Banner for however long he decides to hole up in his apartment, so I have plenty to spare. I’m guessing you eat a lot, huh?”

Steve sat on the edge of the bar stool rubbing the back of his neck self-consciously and cleared his throat. “You could say that.”

“Perfect, I’ve got a family-sized lasagna coming out of the oven in…4 minutes,” she said leaning over to check the timer. “Think you can wait that long?” She smirked at him and he nodded back to her with a smile.

“I just have to find—oh! I forgot about that bowl breaking earlier”

Steve was up and by her side in a flash. “Did you cut yourself, Stasia?”

“No, I’m fine, thank you. Good thing I looked down or I would’ve.” She went to the storage closet to retrieve a broom and started sweeping the pieces up.

“You really shouldn’t be down here barefoot, you know. As pretty as your toenails are, that’s a recipe for disaster.” He instantly felt his face flame, not realizing until after he had said it that he had come off a bit flirtatious.

“Oh really,” she raised an eyebrow at him and looked pointedly down at his own feet that just so happened to also be without shoes. “Is this one of those ‘do as I say, not as I do’ moments?”

Steve couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up. “I guess you could say that. Then again, only one of us is a super-soldier that can heal from a glass cut in under two minutes. I’ll give you a hint and say that it’s not you.”

“Touche,” Stasia giggled along with him. “The lasagna should be done now. Since you’re the indestructible one, could you take it out while I finish getting this glass up?”

Steve nodded and walked to the oven and opened it, groaning in appreciation as the smells hit him in full-force. He placed the pan on the stove top and set about collecting 2 sets of plates and silverware. Once Stasia was back by his side he had everything set out for the both of them. She quietly thanked him and got to work distributing the Italian food between the two plates and handed his to him. Before he knew what he was doing, he had also taken her plate and was placing both across from each other at a small table tucked away in one of the nooks. Stasia filled two glasses with water and made her way over to him.

“So, Steve,” she said while putting the cups on the table and sitting across from him. “How are you? You look exhausted, I can’t imagine how hard the last few days must have been for you.” Stasia looked up at him and he once again thought of how pretty she was. 

“I’m fine,” came his automatic response. He wasn’t though, this one had been difficult. It had taken a toll that he didn’t think would fully hit him until after the effects of sleep-deprivation had cleared. The woman across from him cleared her throat and his eyes darted to hers. She wore joint looks of disbelief and genuine concern while silently chewing her food.

“You don’t have to tell me, I understand. But its clear that you're not fine.”

Sam had been encouraging Steve to open up to people about his feelings more and more lately. While he would never think of talking to a random civilian about the horrors of his job, Stasia had to have high clearance levels to be Bruce’s assistant. Would it be so bad to talk to her about this? They were going to be awake all night anyways. And knowing that she worked up on the R&D floors meant that he would probably never run into her again. What did he have to lose? 

Steve took a deep breath, braced his elbows on the table, and started talking while looking down at his plate. “It was supposed to just be a recon mission to find Buc- umm an acquaintance, but we ended up finding a HYDRA base that was testing out the super-soldier serum on infants. I mean, they couldn’t have even been a year old yet. There were so many of them…they were crying and being kept in these sterile labs. All of them had been injected with the serum so they were slightly bigger than an average baby but it was obvious that they were all malnourished. They weren’t being fed properly you could just tell that they were in so much pain and discomfort. And those were the ones that were actually…alive,” he said, choking on the last word. Steve took a deep breath as tears began to pool in his eyes. He shouldn’t have said anything. He was getting himself all worked up and this girl shouldn’t have to bear witness to his emotional turmoil. This was why he didn’t open up. Too much would come pouring out.

He suddenly heard her chair scraping across the floor as she pushed herself away from the table. He had said too much, gone into too much detail, scared her. And now she was leaving. But as Steve squeezed his eyes shut against the pain of it all and tears began tracking down his face, he felt Stasia’s presence right beside him. Before he knew what was happening, she pushed him back slightly and wrapped him in the tightest embrace he had ever felt since his Ma had died. Steve wanted to hold back, to prove that he was Captain America and didn’t need consoling. However, the minute his head came in contact with her collar bone, he was sinking into the hug, fingers desperately digging in to the back of her dress. 

How long had it been since the last time he had had physical contact with another person that wasn’t just a handshake or punch in the face in the middle of a terrorist attack or world disaster? Steve honestly couldn’t remember. Most people saw him as a hero to be put on a pedestal. Others as an unfeeling machine. No one really touched him, not on purpose anyways. A young intern had accidentally bumped into him in her rush to deliver coffee to Tony a few weeks before and had nearly started sobbing, afraid of the repercussions. Had his last comforting touch truly come from his mother? She had died in 1941. His tears fell faster as he realized that, with Bucky on the run and the Avengers living their separate lives, he really didn’t have anyone to lean on. He didn't even know this girl and here he was sobbing on her shoulder. How pathetic. 

Steve leaned into Stasia’s fingers as they ran through his hair and over his back and shoulders, soaking up any sort of touch she was willing to give. He heard her soft, soothing voice, not paying attention to the actual words, as he cried quietly into her neck. He should’ve pulled back so as not to ruin her pretty dress, but at the moment, he just couldn’t quite give a damn. 

Steve didn’t know how long they stayed in that position, him sitting and holding on to her like she was the only anchor tethering him to earth and her standing, giving him every ounce of comfort she was able. The world went fuzzy after awhile and then suddenly, all was black.

~~~~

It should have been absolutely embarrassing to be caught dancing in the middle of the kitchen and then falling flat on her back in front of Steve “Man With A Plan” Rogers. If he hadn’t have been so kind and immediately worried about her well-being, Stasia probably would’ve died from humiliation. With the extreme pain pulsing through her head from her impact, though, she didn’t really even have time to worry about being nervous in front of him. As it was, she was immensely grateful that his kind and caring nature had kept him from laughing at her expense. Their meeting was long forgotten, however, by the time they had sat down to eat and she had opened her big mouth.

Stasia hadn’t even given her actions a second thought after the moment she saw the tears in Steve Rogers’ eyes from across the table. Seeing such a strong man that the world literally depended on breaking down in front of her had fractured her heart. In all of the press conferences she had ever seen him at, he had been the picture of stone-faced control. She had often wondered if missions even got to him anymore. She had her answer. 

After an hour or so of whispering what she hoped were comforting words in his ear and hugging him tightly, Stasia heard Steve’s breaths begin to even out. If he had been exhausted before, he must be practically in a coma by now. Wondering what she should do with a dead-weighted super soldier, Stasia spotted the entrance to the huge living room that Tony had equipped with multiple flat-screen televisions and five sectional couches. There was no way she could make it all the way up to his room, but if she could get him on one of those, he could at least get some well-deserved sleep. 

“Steve,” she whispered softly. He didn’t move. “Steve.” Stasia began gently tapping his back and he groaned his acknowledgment. “Steve, can you help me walk into the living room? I need to sit down on the couch.” If nothing else got him moving in this state, maybe his famous chivalrous conscience would. Just as she’d thought, he began to stand up and lead her into the next room. His eyes were half open and glassed over and she knew he wasn’t actually aware of anything going on around him. She was overcome with sympathy for this brave young man who the world thought to be untouchable. He felt too. Was anyone ever there for him when the horrors filling his mind proved to be too much?

Eyeing the first large couch closest to them, Stasia pulled him over to it and pushed back on his chest so that he would fall back onto it. “Steve, why don’t you lay down and get some rest?” She made sure he did as she asked before going to gather a few blankets from a hall closet. After placing one over his feet, she crouched down next to his head to start arranging another blanket over his chest. Stasia looked up at his face, surprised at seeing it looking so calm and peaceful after all of the crying that he had done. He looked younger like this. More handsome if that was even possible. He was completely at ease. It was easy to see the young man he had once been in the 40s. While he hadn’t aged much physically since then, the emotional weight that he obviously carried around with him made him look older when he was awake, more stern. Reaching out to brush a few stay hairs away from his face, Stasia startled when his hands shot out and pulled her up onto the couch with him. He was definitely as strong as the rumors had said. After some zombie-like maneuvering on his part, she ended up under Steve, laying on her back, with his head pillowed on her stomach and his arms desperately clutching her in his sleep. She could now file “cuddler” under her mental “Steve Rogers is a…” file. 

Stasia knew that the only way out of his grip would be to wake him up and ask, but not only would that interrupt his much-needed sleep, it would also probably embarrass the hell out of him. Sighing in resignation, she decided to let him rest and save the inevitable awkwardness for tomorrow. He had told her that she needed to stay awake for the night anyways, so she decided to stay where she was and let him have at least a few peaceful hours. Her fingers began running through his thick blonde hair and, before long, he sighed, body completely relaxing, and burrowed deeper into her. 

“Jarvis, could you turn off the ovens, please,” she whispered to the ceiling, making herself as comfortable as was possible while being under two hundred plus pounds of superhero. “I don’t think I’ll be making it back into the kitchen tonight.” 

“Yes, Miss Sinclair,” answered the AI at a much quieter volume than normal.


End file.
